America's #1 Balance Bike Destination

America's #1 Balance Bike Destination
America's #1 Balance Bike Destination

20 July 2007

Life's cruel joke

I work in an industry which I have zero, zip, nada, zilch interest in, what-so-effin-ever. How did I end up here? Feeling so jaded.. I so badly want to get a job doing something I love.. too bad I'd probably have to take a 60-70% pay cut.. That's what you call STUCK... and it makes the distaste for one's profession ever fiercer. That I never got to choose the path I really wanted grinds my gears the most though... I'm cursed/blessed with great hands.. I can make things, create, repair.. but once you reach the limits of income which using the hands brings, you look up the totem pole and discover that there's folks up there keeping their hands clean and making triple the money.. Attracts you like a moth to a flame.. So you pursue it, you position yourself higher, thumb your nose at those still on the shop floor.. But you get burnt.. not right away..over time.. it's a slow, smoldering kind of burn.. you don't realize you're on fire until it's too late. Candles burn only at the top for a reason.. Burn-out. I don't have a college education. But I make as much money as if I had a masters degree. Construction is nice that way. As long as you can perform, edumacation don't matter. It's a one way street though.. choose the path of learning a trade, skip college, work your way to the top.. there's no turning back. No other industry will pay big bucks to a high school grad who's a good carpenter or good cabinet maker or a good project manager or a good estimator. No way out. Construction, and all the douch-bag mofos who I deal with day in and day out (not refering to co-workers here), are an inextricable part of my life.. and it breaks my heart to think about it. Partly explains why I must commute to work by bike every day.. Riding home especially, it creates a buffer for the noggin, so that all of the toxicity fed in through my ear and into my head is diluted with fresh air, speed, effort, and the time I get home.. It's the equivalent of knocking back a glass of wine or chugging a beer.. So.. where is my dream job in the bicycle industry? it's probably out there.. and probably pays too little. Ebru would need to take a 2nd husband for us to make ends meet. Either that or get a job herself.. So why not start my own business? I don't have an apetite for risk. Sure money is available to make a go of it.. but it will require sacrifice. The question being.. is it as large a sacrifice as my slow death in construction? Who the fuck knows. Maybe I'll never know. My head hurts now.    


Anonymous said...

Nice post. Always stick to the tried and tested. That's not what I would've suggested to you 20 years ago (how old are you again??), but you now have a kid that depends on you...

hans said...

Murat, sorry to hear this.
You can find my email address on my blog. Sent me your resume.
Have some connections in the bicycle industry. You never knows.
Americans are dominating the Tour de France for a long time. There must be something out there for you.

Celal Birader said...

Hello Murat,

Sorry to hear that.

Anonymous is right "always stick to the tried and tested". Maybe you can go to night school and get some civil engineering qualifications ?

What did Edith Piaff say?: "Je ne regrette rien".

Seems to be a lotta wisdom in that.

Redneck Texan said...

Dude..... I sympathize with, and can relate to, every word of that post...... I know exactly where you are coming from.

I've been in the commercial construction industry since I was 17, earlier actually as I used to help my Dad frame houses since I was 11. I've been everything from a laborer, to a Project manager, before settling on the easy life of an estimator...... it all sucks.

......its all about weekends and the evenings dude. Thats why I do it. I drive over an hour one way from the stinkin city to my rural paradise, and I enjoy every fuckin minute THERE. should I make of Turkey's election?

Was this the resounding defeat for secularism the MSM leads me to think it was?

Noel said...

The bicycle industry is calling you- hope there is something there. I would suggest opening a shop, but I went through that 30 years ago with motorcycles, and it is a big hassle, even if you have money backing you.

Ardent said...

I think you are having a bad day Murat and not looking at things clearly.

Let me give you the mail, there is NO DREAM job. Every job has its advantages and drawbacks. Every company that you work for will have certain benefits and different pit falls. No matter what you do in life you have to ANSWER to somebody.

The Industry that you work for makes no difference. With increasing competition and shareholders constantly requesting bigger profits and dividends, companies are putting the squeeze on staff. It does not matter if you are in Construction, Manufacturing or Advertising, you have to work to budgets and you need to answer to higher management and the public.

Personally I believe the best business is the manufacture of Facial tissues (Kleenex), the consumer uses the Tissue to wipe their nose once and then they discard the product. One does not need to service faulty workmanship, follow consumer complaints and there are no guarantees with the product. The consumer must always buy more, use it once, throw it away and then buy more.

An American Guy named Jake who lives in Adana, recently touched on the same subject on his blog. You may want to read his thoughts:-


super hero said...

i totaly sympathize with your displeasure. i have been there, and even though i dont have much to complain nowadays, i can say i am still there. and you just cant change the route because you have responsibilities.

but Ardent has a point too. there is really not a thing such as DREAM JOB. wherever you go, whatever you do, there will be some discomfort in a way or other. but then, if there is nothing such as total happiness, why dont seek it in another career which you will feel better anyhow. argh, life really sucks sometimes.

Burcu said...

Murat, you know how much I like my job. I had always wanted to work in university and finally I did it. Every day believe me I thank God that I am an academic. Yet, you also know that my salary is very low. Very very very low. And i will never earn more than this. Yes I am a woman, I dont have a child (at least for now), dad helps me etc. Three years ago, I was earning nearly same amount of money by working part time. But this is my choice. Everbody has their own desires and limits. But "always stick to the tried and tested"? No, no, no and no. You dont have to stand anything just because you have a family. It is true that they need you but if you are unhappy, I am sure they will be unhappy too.

Murat said...

I am really happy about all of the great comments and don't know where to begin.. I guess 'thank you' works.. More later.

William Hicks said...


I know plenty of people who make a living in the bicycle industry that make plenty of money... companies need sales reps, Tech coordinators, R and D people... I would stay away from retail, but there's stuff galore out there... Cervelo is lookin' for people to do stuff, but you'd have to move to Toronto or somethin'... Eh?

(I love my Cervelo!)

...Tried and Tested?! Fork that shit!

Did you ever see that movie "The Rookie"?

Nothin's easy. My parents grew up being afraid of everything and lost themselves to the mindless fear that came to rule their lives and still does.

Remember... If you visualize yourself in a certain place long enough, you will get there.